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 How data realms will rule a country 
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Loose Canon
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School lol. I'd like to set up a system of trade schools and ♥♥♥♥, but Specialization seems more like "Ship em off to various kinds of brainwashing camps".


Mon Mar 03, 2014 9:55 pm
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We could tax the gypsies, and make it a thing, like bhutan does with its monasteries.


Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:56 pm
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Tue Mar 04, 2014 5:33 pm
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==Overview==
The Community of Data realms is a small, genial nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape. Its compassionate, cynical population of 32 million are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government -- a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass -- juggles the competing demands of Education, Defence, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 37%, but much higher for the wealthy. A robust private sector is led by the Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Automobile Manufacturing industries.

Most of the military's funding goes into researching space-age weaponry, untold millions of Datas are going into a new government-funded maternity leave scheme, loans are available for students from poor families, and a recent law has banned homes from having any more than one wheel. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Data realms's national animal is the Cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the Data.

==Issues==
Maestro, Please(Issue 27)
A delegation from the Data realms Philharmonia has shown up in your office, underlining their petition for the renovation of the nation's concert halls with a serenade.


1 "The once venerable concert halls of Data realms are in a sorry state," laments trombonist Violet Falopian, emptying the spit valve into your waste paper basket. "Some are dank, the stucco is crumbling in others, and it's raining through the backstage roof of another! In the name of culture we must restore these halls to their former glory. It's only a pittance to the national budget, but to our cultural reputation? Priceless."


2 "These caterwauling miscreants don't deserve concert halls," insists John Yeats, a tone-deaf curmudgeon. "If they can't support their hobby, then why should we, the suffering taxpayers, prop them up? Concert halls are businesses, and businesses that can't stay afloat on their own disappear. Such is life. I say leave the whole lot to their inevitable demise."


3 "Times are tight. I sympathize with you," consoles Kayla Nguyen, the CEO of Restorations R Us, handing you a decorative 'Hang In There' basket of goodies. "However, you need only ask, and - quick as a whip - my company will fund the construction of concert halls all across this fair country. All I ask is that we put up some advertisements in the lobbies and integrate a tasteful nod to sponsors into the programmes."


4 "The only reason to fund these musicians is if they are doing something worthwhile for their country," says Brigadier General Lee Ruff. "I've long said that Data realms's Armed Forces would benefit greatly from a spic-and-span band in uniform. They would represent the splendor that embodies Data realms and they'd do it with pride! Of course by extension, they would be a part of the active forces and required to serve in battle if necessary. Always good to up the recruitment numbers, right?"

Is our children learning?(Issue 26)
When a relatively minor official in your government vowed to increase the standard of education in Data realms, the press came knocking on your door to ask how this might actually be done.


1 "It's all a question of money," says veteran teacher Howard Hendrikson, "If we really care about education, we'll make it our number one priority. Double the education budget, halve the teacher-student ratio, and make sure every teacher has a master's degree in education. After all, the children are our future."


2 "As much as I'd like to have more money, it's really a question of most of the faculty belonging to one of the most powerful unions in the whole of Data realms that stops this school from being great," says Principal Falala Khan, "I can't discover which teachers are good and reward them for their excellent work, nor fire the useless ones. Destroying teachers' unions is perhaps the most important thing we could do."


3 "I think specialization is the way to go," says your defense minister, standing arm in arm with a bishop of a major religion and Data realms's top CEO, "Specialization lets each focus on what they're truly good at, and I'm sure that religious institutions, the military, and private companies would fork out a bit to train up the next generation, so we could save on taxes too."

One Wife Is Never Enough, Say Polygamists(Issue 28)
A small religious group is lobbying the government to allow them to take multiple wives.


1 "It's about time we had our religious rights recognized," says Louis O'Bannon, a devout member of a faith that is never made quite clear. "Who is the government to tell me I can't love more than one woman? The government doesn't know how much of me there is to go around!"


2 "This is nothing more than sexual deviants using religion as a pretext for perversion!" says Reverend Howard Shiomi. "Marriage is one man, one woman, and death do we part. What's so hard to get? Anything else is a perversion, and must be banned."


3 "Multiple wives? Excellent!" says passer-by Falala Song. "Presumably we will allow multiple husbands, as well. And gay marriages, of course. In fact, now is probably the time for the government to butt out of marriage altogether. Let people marry their cats, if they want."


Tue Mar 04, 2014 7:05 pm
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Our tax is TOO DAMN HIGH 37%


Tue Mar 04, 2014 7:06 pm
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Tue Mar 04, 2014 7:08 pm
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Tue Mar 04, 2014 7:11 pm
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TorrentHKU wrote:
3
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3


Tue Mar 04, 2014 7:11 pm
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Wed Mar 05, 2014 9:45 pm
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Is our children learning?(Issue 26)
When a relatively minor official in your government vowed to increase the standard of education in Data realms, the press came knocking on your door to ask how this might actually be done.


1 "It's all a question of money," says veteran teacher Howard Hendrikson, "If we really care about education, we'll make it our number one priority. Double the education budget, halve the teacher-student ratio, and make sure every teacher has a master's degree in education. After all, the children are our future."


2 "As much as I'd like to have more money, it's really a question of most of the faculty belonging to one of the most powerful unions in the whole of Data realms that stops this school from being great," says Principal Falala Khan, "I can't discover which teachers are good and reward them for their excellent work, nor fire the useless ones. Destroying teachers' unions is perhaps the most important thing we could do."


3 "I think specialization is the way to go," says your defense minister, standing arm in arm with a bishop of a major religion and Data realms's top CEO, "Specialization lets each focus on what they're truly good at, and I'm sure that religious institutions, the military, and private companies would fork out a bit to train up the next generation, so we could save on taxes too."

Much Ado About Abortion(Issue 29)
A monstrous debate between pro-life and pro-choice groups has erupted after a high-profile case of a pregnant woman aborting her foetus because she 'didn't feel like it' hit the tabloids.


1 Bianca Jamieson, lawyer for the woman known only as Miss X, says, "It is Miss X's right to choose! It's her body; she can do whatever she wants with it. In the interest of women's rights, abortion MUST be legal throughout the country!"


2 "I most vehemently disagree," says Steffan Utopia, a pro-life activist. "I'm all for women's rights in general, but what about the child? Does it have no rights either? Abortion is totally immoral and I insist that it be outlawed except in cases of rape, or when the mother's life is in danger."


3 "You're not going far enough! Abortion is murder!" shouts Reverend Robin Goethe, waving a placard with a picture of a foetus on it. "God decides which babies live and which will die, not us! The government must maintain a stern anti-abortion stance to preserve the morality of Data realms!"


4 "Abortion has to be legal if we're going to last as a nation," says Brian Dubois, President of the Society of Bitter Old People. "Have you ever thought that with Data realms's growing population of 36 million, we soon aren't going to be able to squeeze any more people within our borders? If we use abortion to control the population, we'll make great savings and can spend the money elsewhere. One child per family should just about do it I think. Extraneous ones can be sold to other countries."

Drunk Driving On The Rise(Issue 30)
More and more, citizens are drinking before getting behind the wheel. A group of concerned citizens wants something done.


1 Tim Anderson, head of Data realms's chapter of Alcoholics Anonymous, says that drunk drivers need help. "Alcoholism is a nasty thing, a disease. The government has to help these poor souls to avoid the temptations of liquor, and wine, and beer, and hard cider, and brandy, and?" His eyes get a glazed far off look, "Where was I? Oh right, we have to help these people, not imprison them."


2 "That's lovely," says Ivan Longfellow, a noted anti-alcohol advocate, "In a perfect world where rehab fixes everything. But this is the real world, and it doesn't bring back the victims. Drunk drivers kill people every day. If they take other's lives, the government must take theirs!"


3 "All of those plans attack the symptoms, not the disease," says Minister of Transportation Pete Bronte, "Alcohol is a curse, a poison sent by the Devil to tempt mankind. We cannot trust people to make decisions for themselves. The only answer is prohibition. Ban alcohol completely."


Wed Mar 05, 2014 9:49 pm
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I don't like any of the drunk driving choices, really.


Thu Mar 06, 2014 12:10 am
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TorrentHKU wrote:
1
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I don't like any of the drunk driving choices, really.

Education is very important; enlightened, experienced, and well-rounded people are very capable at solving world problems, and innovating. (Even if innovation is p much combinatorics with technology)
A lot of mental faculties of babies don't manifest until long after birth, so honestly, screw them, especially in a first world country.
Drunk driving... a lot of people could do with responsible, and healthy recreational use of drugs.


Thu Mar 06, 2014 6:42 am
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3,
Abstain,
2.

That'll teach drunk drivers! Prepare the firing squads!


Thu Mar 06, 2014 6:48 am
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God damn subsidies, caek


Thu Mar 06, 2014 7:09 am
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Thu Mar 06, 2014 8:47 am
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