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 Roll to Dodge GOD 
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Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2009 11:46 pm
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
"Is there a key for this or...
Force my way into the vault.


Sun Nov 29, 2015 2:41 am
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
> Believe in the heart of the cards. Draw.


Sun Nov 29, 2015 4:37 am
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
>JUST START YELLING
"HELBP"


Sun Nov 29, 2015 5:11 am
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
"When in doubt...time travel."
Bust out the demon dice, high roll, take us back around three or four hours so that we might better prepare for the fight and not get ganked.


Sun Nov 29, 2015 8:53 am
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
> Romantically kiss my bone friend in our final moments together.


Sun Nov 29, 2015 5:26 pm
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
Steal Pegbeard's peg-beard before hitching a one way ticket back in time.


Sun Nov 29, 2015 8:12 pm
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
>Send golems at Queen thing, shoot even more sporks.
"YOU WOT M8"


Mon Nov 30, 2015 7:23 am
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
> I need medical attention, try to heal myself

"MEDIC!"


Mon Nov 30, 2015 9:53 am
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
Chrimbus Roll!

dragonxp: [5+1=6]
dragonxp: "YOU WOT M8"
Responding to your mental commands, your two spork golems leap into action, one launching the other towards the Queen, then sprinting across the ground directly for her. The flying golem is struck by an eye beam in the torso, evaporating it mid flight and hitting the Queen with a smatter of warm sporks. Meanwhile, the other golem takes a fallen dice table as a ramp, stomping up its length before leaping through the air at the Queen.
As your golem flies, you take control of the first golem's sporks, whirling them into a sporky hurricane that quickly gets tangled in the Queen's hair. With the sporks distracting her, the second golem makes itself to the Queen without issue, and begins stabbing her in the face with its giant spork hands, somewhat ineffectually. Well, it IS made of plastic sporks after all. The Queen seems even more pissed than before though, with a large number of plastic sporks stuck in her hair.

Character:


CrazyMLC: [2]
Realizing your end is imminent, you sweep up your skellington friend in your arms and move in for a big romantic kiss.'

You soon realize that you're sticking your tongue into the empty mouth of a skeleton, and feel very weird. Then he bites down on your tongue.
OI DICKUS, THE HELL U THINK UR DOING.
He swats you over the head as the two of you are surrounded by a white, dicey glow.
BAKA.

Character:


TheKebbit: [4]
"HELBP"
Suddenly, an ambulance smashes through the wall, bearing the mark of the Queen's Royal Medical Care Services, all funded under the Communist Dictatorial Tyranny the Queen runs with a benevolent laser fist. They sweep you up into the ambulance, then shoot off at full tilt again through the wall, off to the nearest medical center. As you sit in the ambulance, dazed and confused, several paramedics begin firing rapid fire questions at you.
"Oi guv, alright we're gonn fix you right up good as a bucket a sunshine, right aye."
"Eugene, stats, wot wot."
"Roight. 100 over 70, pale, none found, nineteen forty-five."
"Lovely! Alright lad, you're not bleedin' out, what seems to be the problem?"

There's a large bump in the ambulance's ride, and a muffled scream outside. The paramedics ignore it.

Character:


CaveCricket48: [5]
You draw, trusting in the heart of the cards.
...Pot of Greed. Well, that's actually pretty good. You play the Pot, with Pegbeard's emo ghost grumbling about banned cards and yours smirking.
Then you draw Megamorph and Change of Heart.
...Oh. Oh my. Well, this changes things. You first play Megamorph on the Blue Eyes, somewhat confusing Pegbeard and his ghost, as you just made its Blue Eyes have 9000 Atk points.
You then play Change of Heart, stealing the 9000 Atk Blue Eyes. Pegbeard and his stand then begin panicking and yelling, as the semi-solid spirit manifestation of a three headed white dragon engine of destruction waddles over to your side of the field.
Battle phase.

Character:


caekdaemon: [4]
Ok, you aint got time for this anymore.
"When in doubt...time travel. Devil Dice! Take us back in time, to before this mess started!"
You roll the dice on the ground, getting a 5, as expected. The dice, and you, both begin glowing with an unearthly dicey light, before everything turns white in a flash. Suddenly, there's the sound of waves and the smell of salt, with some lights coming from behind you. Opening your eyes and looking around, you find yourself at port in some possibly Caribbean country. It's nighttime, and behind you, several bars and inns are lit and loud with sailor and pirate patrons. Next to you are MLC and Maarten, but... none of the others? Odd.

Character:


maart3n: [5]
Looking around, you see Pegbeard and Cave doing a weird card game duel, with a weird emo ghost straight out of Hot Topic behind both of them, and a big three headed white ghost dragon facing Cave. Hmmm. Idea!
You quietly sneak over towards the two, as Cave does something, Pegbeard and his ghost gets angry, and the dragon turns around to face Pegbeard. CHANCE!
You leap forward, snagging the peg-beard right off Pegbeard's chin, with a snap of eldritch magic breaking.
NO! MY BEARD! MY PEG!
You waggle blow a raspberry at Pegbeard, right as you start to glow and get teleported away, back in time.

Character:


Seraphimo: [1]
"MEDIC!"
Suddenly, an ambulance smashes through the wall! They then drive right past you, and go to pick up Kebb. Ungrateful shits.
Wait, it's driving this way? Oh no. Oh god no no please I DIDN'T MEAN IT WAIT-
The ambulance drives straight for you, and then drives right over you with a bump and another scream from you.
THE MEDICAL CARE SYSTEM HAS BETRAYED YOU.

Character:


Ociamarru: [3]
"Is there a key for this or..."
"N-no key. It's a combination and fingerprint scanner and eye scanner."

Hmmm.
You fire your rocket hand into the combination lock keypad, eliciting another scared squeak from the casino girl and sending small number keys and electronics shrapnel everywhere. The digital readout above the keypad lights up green, accepting the code you punched in. Excellent! Now you're one handed.

Character:


Events:
The Queen continues flailing angrily, now covered in sporks. Caek, MLC, and Maarten all teleport to a far off seaside port town, where they started their adventure before somehow getting upon Pegbeard's ship. Cave continues his duel with the de-peg bearded Pegbeard, now in controlled of an amped up Blue Eyes White Dragon, capable of vaporizing almost anything with its Burst Stream of Destruction.


Wed Dec 23, 2015 7:03 pm
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
"Port Royale...you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious..."

Head into a cantina gambling den, but first, speak with the people who came with me.

"Right, now here's the plan; I've got the ability to make the dice come out any number I want, whenever I want, but I can't stop the fact that I've done so from appearing in my eyes. Something to do with the rules, I guess...but if one of you were to go gambling, I could sit near the bar and rig the die without getting caught."

"That means we always win whenever we gamble, and we'll absolutely rake in a fortune whilst we're here. I just need someone to do the gambling for me; we split our winnings 50/50, and if we find someone willing to gamble a ship or something we'll get off this island and go to Monte Carlo for the big leagues. Money, fame, whatever you want, it'll be ours for the taking."

"Any takers?"


Wed Dec 23, 2015 9:41 pm
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
"I guess we could do that. Like, have you make us fail every bet, and then we bet everything we have and make them laugh at us as everyone goes all in, then you make us win."


Last edited by CrazyMLC on Wed Dec 23, 2015 11:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.



Wed Dec 23, 2015 10:43 pm
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
CrazyMLC wrote:
"MY TRUE LOVE! NOOOOOOOOOO!"

> PUNCH THE EARTH

Quote:
He swats you over the head as the two of you are surrounded by a white, dicey glow.


Wed Dec 23, 2015 11:05 pm
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
"AM HAVE LOSTED USE OF ENGLAND WORD AND ALSO THE MATH GLYPHICS"
>HELBP


Thu Dec 24, 2015 4:00 am
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
Stick the newly acquired partial ship wheel on the back of the fortress of diplomacy. In such a way that it looks like a wooden halo.
"Well gents, best of luck I'll come along to expand my skellington army."


Thu Dec 24, 2015 4:02 am
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Post Re: Roll to Dodge GOD
>Stab Queen in Eyeballs with Sporks


Thu Dec 24, 2015 12:20 pm
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