Post your funny stories or crazy war tales here while we try not to explode from the soon to be new build.

Ill go first: I always give 1 green clone an AK47, a dynamite stick and a suicide bomb. I was holding off about 8 skeletons from the top of my brain room when this nerd from behind shoots me in the leg with a blunderbuss. No big deal, just one leg. While I kill him, I get shot with a SMG in the other leg, and its gone. So i fall to the ground, refusing to use my jetpack as I mow down 2 other skeletons. I run out of ammo, and throw a stick of dynamite straight up. I wait until the guys are standing right on top of me, and I throw the suicide bomb, which causes a chain reaction with the dynamite in the air, and peppers the ground with shrapnel. Everything just falls over. I think its over, and then this dropship comes screaming in, straight on this green clone which wasn't killed.

Good times.

Well, while making my rpg, I had it constantly fire out tons and tons of pixels in every direction so that it flew up in the air whilst making pools of blood out of anyone nearby.

There was Alenth's modded heavy digger that took out the entire base once his player hit the ground. Hard.

There was the random rain of blood that lasted for over 12 seconds that was just a constant downpour... forget how we did that, but it was with a normal clone.

There's always shooting yourself in the ass, around the map, in a heat death mode match.

Works better with explosive weapons, there's nothing like shooting yourself with a bolter from around the map.

Haha, I've done that with the AK, hit me right in the head for an instant kill.

Hmm, multiple times I've buried guys in wreckage, because then nothing can hurt them but they can shoot up through the wreckage. It works really well, and it's one of my favorite tactics. I've taken out both dropships and rockets mid-flight with my dropships engines and gotten away unscathed. Of course, I've failed at that plenty of times. Then there's always when you shoot out the dropship's engine from the ground and it spins, smacks into the ground and goes FLYING into your face from the angular momentum. Hmm... maybe that could help with the whole wheels thing.

At one point, I used a digger to cut out the ground below my base so that the clones would walk to be directly underneath the brain and just stay there. That works pretty well. Need roof guards though.

I've lost numerous times from one guy, legless with less than 30 health, getting stuck under a dropship and wiggling his way through the concrete into my brain-room. Once, he bled to death RIGHT after he killed my brain. Go figure.

Now i have an (kinda) invincible brain witch for some reason has 1 hp, anyways i was blasting it with a digger
on pershes map and the colective forse of the digger and the brain fluids made me start sinking into the uber hard
cement!

I was just screwing around on the lockdown map, running around mowing down hordes of guys with AK47s. Anyways, I was walking across the roof of my base when i see a mob of skeletons and green clones slowly climbing up a 45 degree dropship that crashed on the corner. There was a ramp of dead stuff, so thats how they got there. Anyway, I opened fire at a fairly high angle, and just watched as they fell down the small ledge of the dropship to the ground, or tumbled backwards down the hill. I finished my clip, started to reload, and jetted up to the ledge to kill any survivors. Just then, one of the bullets that i fired came back around, and hit me in the head. It didn't kill em, but I had about 20 health and was bleeding. I threw done my AK47, pulled out a stick of dynamite, and flew towards a dropship to my right above my brain room. There was a small pile of guys wandering back and forth above my brain, so I flew above the dropship with 4 health to go, threw the dynamite, and then threw the suicide bomb. the right engine blew off, plummeting it into the guys below. It was spinning from the other engine, and when it hit, killed about five guys, and then rolled down the hill onto about three more.

Yay!

I love flying the dropship across the screen so fast that the background messes up, and then crashing it into the ground. Sometimes, if you go fast enough, the wreckage will roll across the map multiple times, killing anything in it's way.

Also, doing the same thing with a clone or robot is fun, but it only works if they don't have anything equipped and they're missing some limbs. A clone at Mach 3 is a wonderful anti - dropship weapon!

one time, i was just sitting on top of the rocket silo with the APL, and i saw a rocket come and land on the other side of me. i took the APL, fired, and hit the rocket in the top right corner. this caused the rocket to spin, and i fired another round and hit the rocket at the same angle, except the rocket was upside down when the other round hit, causing the rocket to have a massive gas leak in the upper right and lower left corners, sending the rocket in a violent cartwheel going off screen just to come back around and rip the clone i shot the rocket with in the first place all to shreds.

oh, anyone else tried to shoot down a rocket only to have it turn upside down and come crashing through the brain vault ceiling and release skeletons inside the brain room, 2 inches from the brain. theres just no time to react to that man, its horrible!

all i got

Once, this happened when I shot down a dropship.

EDIT : Bottom to top because James' attachment style sucks.

I waay raised the sharpness and lifetime of the AK, and turned the bullets blue.

That was the one I kept killing myself with.

Then there was my autoshotgun, fired 16 round clips in about 2 seconds real time. 16 particles, too, rather than 8.

Digs through concrete right quick.

Good times, good times.

Look what I have done with the poor pod ship....

Wtf what ship is that a ufo?

what the crap did you do to that thing?

Here's a story.

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway
house in you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask
to visit someone who calls himself "The Holder of the End". Should
a look of child-like fear come over the workers face, you will then
be taken to a cell in the building. It will be in a deep hidden
section of the building. All you will hear is the sound of someone
talking to themselves echo the halls. It is in a language that you
will not understand, but your very soul will feel unspeakable fear.

Should the talking stop at any time, STOP and QUICKLY say aloud "I'm
just passing through, I wish to talk." If you still hear silence,
flee. Leave, do not stop for anything, do not go home, don't stay at
an inn, just keep moving, sleep where your body drops. You will know
in the morning if you've escaped.

If the voice in the hall comes back after you utter those words
continue on. Upon reaching the cell all you will see is a windowless
room with a person in the corner, speaking an unknown language, and
cradling something. The person will only respond to one question.
"What happens when they all come together?"

The person will then stare into your eyes and answer your question
in horrifying detail. Many go mad in that very cell, some disappear
soon after the meeting, a few end their lives. But most do the worst
thing, and look upon the object in the person's hands. You will want
to as well. Be warned that if you do, your death will be one of
cruelty and unrelenting horror.

Your death will be in that room, by that person's hands.

That object is 1 of 2538. They must never come together.

Never.

I have the stories of 9 of these objects. They must never come together.